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| Sitting In A Bar |
An Australian, an Irishman and an Englishman were sitting in a bar.
There was only one other person in the bar.It was a man.
The three men kept looking at this other man, for he seemed terribly familiar.
They stared and stared, wondering where they had seen him before, when suddenly the Irishman cried out My God, I know who that man is. Its Jesus
The others looked again and, sure enough, it was Jesus himself, sitting alone at a table.
The Irishman calls out, Hey You, Are you Jesus
The man looks over at him, smiles a small smile and nods his head.
Yes, I am Jesus he says.
The Irishman calls the bartender over and says to him Id like you to give Jesus over there a pint of Guinness from me.
So the bartender pours Jesus a Guinness and takes it over to his table.
Jesus looks over, raises his glass, smiles thank you and drinks..
The Englishman then calls out, Errr, excuse me Sir but would you be Jesus
Jesus smiles and says, Yes, I am Jesus.
The Englishman beckons the bartender and tells him to send over a Pint of Newcastle Brown Ale for Jesus.
This the bartender duly does. As before, Jesus accepts the drink and smiles over at the men.
Then the Australian calls out, Oi, you Doya reckons your Jesus, or what
Jesus nods and says, Yes, I am Jesus.
The Australian is mighty impressed and has the bartender send over Schooner of Victoria Bitter for Jesus, this he accepts with pleasure.
Some time later, after finishing the drinks, Jesus leaves his seat and approaches the three men He reaches for the hand of the Irishman and shakes it, thanking him for the Guinness. When he lets go, the Irishman gives a cry of amazement
Oh God, the arthritis is gone, he says. The arthritis I had for years is gone. Its a miracle
Jesus then shakes the hand of the Englishman, thanking him for the Newcastle Brown Ale. Upon letting go, the Englishmans eyes widen in shock.
By Jove, he exclaims, The migraine Ive had for over 40 years is completely gone. Its a Miracle Jesus then approaches the Australian, who has a terrified look on his face.
The Aussie whispers. Piss off mate, Im on Workers Comp.... |
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life is half spent the before one knows what life is
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Ears: It takes just over 3 kilograms (7 pounds) of pressure to tear off a human ear.
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